True Love in depth

My old buddy "C" from the true love post, was the topic of conversation again this weekend. You see, C was the mutual friend and tournament partner of J, my current tournament partner. The three of us hung around each other for the better part of 15 years...Until both J and I had enough of C's bullshit, and mutually kicked him out of the circle. J and I fished a couple of times this weekend, and the topic of C came up repeatedly. There was a lot of laughs...and equal anger...in retelling our old stories about C.

C is the funniest guy I ever knew. He was a true original, and never followed any fads or trends...he set them. He could have been a legendary stand up comic; with his angst and antic ridden delivery, if he had only applied himself. His sense of humor was dry and sarcastic, but it permeated EVERYTHING he did...and it was funny. He often coined his own words that became part of the local lexicon. His comic was genius, and provided him a way to hide from the world; but one day the fun just ran out. C could not buy or joke his way past the fact that we all were growing up. His friends now had real jobs, real wives, and real problems that could not be solved by making a joke. He was still acting like he was 14, and it started to grate on everyone he associated with.

C was a man with problems obvious to everyone but himself. I would not call him an alcoholic, but he was the biggest party animal I ever saw. It was nothing for him to drink a case of Busch lite every night. He is a big teddy-bear of a guy, who would give you the shirt off his back if you're his friend...and kick your ass at the drop of a hat if you were not. He was a trust-fund kid, wealthy from the untimely demise of his father, and hell bent on spending every cent of the money in the stupidest ways possible. At the time, C had NO concept of responsibility whatsoever. That may have changed, I don't know, but it was chronic at the time. C and I would have plans to fish some tournament hundreds of miles away, and I would arrive at 3 AM to pick him up, only to find him just arriving home from the bar...totally wasted. Time after time this happened to both J and me, and we had finally had enough.

The straw that broke the friendship for me went like this.

C called me up one night and asked me to go to Canada fishing with some guys I did not know. I was a last minute substitution for someone who dropped out, but it was DEFINITELY going to happen. Things were all set to go, I was told, if I could be ready to go...it was on. To make matters worse, I was asked if I could drive (which should have tipped me off to one of C's schemes). It was agreed I could have until 6 PM the following night to get ready, so the next morning was spent arranging to miss all my college courses for a week, finding replacements for my shifts at work, and gathering up all the gear needed for a week of camping in another country. I drove 85 miles and spent $400 to outfit myself with things I would need, had the vehicle serviced, and bought some groceries. After a frantic 11 hours of preparation, I felt I had done everything I could, packed the car and left to pick up C.

He was not there. C's roommate said he didn't know anything about any fishing trip, but I could most likely find C at our bar of choice. I was ready to snap, but I left word that I would be at home, awaiting a call as to when the group would be ready. If I went to the bar, one of us would be leaving in an ambulance.

6 PM, 7PM, 8PM...Midnight, still no word from C. No word all night as a matter of fact, not until 3PM the next day did I hear from C.

His response? "We were just TALKING about going" he said. "We were just TRYING to pull it together". "So and So can't go now either, so I said forget it. I must have forgot to call you".

I have not spoken to C since that day. Turns out, C was trying to secure ME and my car before even bringing it up to the "others". He had spent a couple of half-hearted phone calls after hearing my commitment, trying to convince the others they could get ready on similar short notice. Being mere mortals (and much more savvy about C), they declined to even try. I found out about this years later.

So ended a friendship of 15 years.