Shiftless

one of the things I miss about working (yes I am STILL sans job), was that I was inevitably parked in front of my computer all day. If I had a thought...or some would say the absence of one...I could post it on here as it happened. Now I am running around somewhere tying up loose ends, and I think something, and say "That needs to be blogged", but I always have something else on my mind when I actually COULD do it.

You, the faithful, suffer as a result.

While that may not be quite the truth, we all know that a daily step into Gomer's Pyle is just the olfactory assault you need to finally come to grips with the fact that your life is not quite so rank as you thought. The deliciously oozy feeling you get when the Pyle is forced between your toes, serves as a constant reminder that they do, really, need to be washed occasionally. For your own well being.

So...prepare for the treatment. Gomer's Spa has just the right Eau de Pyle' to bring you to aromatherapy nirvana. A catch-up session packing 100% of the U.S. RDA of pungent, shiftless, nonsensical, blogging claptrap.

1. Since my last post the snow is gone. It's now brown and ugly...but that much closer to fishing season.

2. Since my last post, I have sold the gun I creamed my jeans over last summer because I did not really like it. The money will be applied to wine...which I am quite sure I enjoy.

3. I have a line on a job...even a damned good looking resume', but nobody has seen it yet. (I keep telling myself it might work that way if I will it enough.)

4. My tournament partner and I have secured another paying sponsor to our fishing season. That is an incredible financial relief. Now only a paltry 73% of our costs remain uncovered. No fucking wonder I went out of business.

5. I've sold a few more fishing rods for less than it cost me to build them...ditto #4.

6. Maximum Impact Rods is sponsoring a spring-league sporting clays team, of which I am of course a member. Never mind that it costs $225 to sponsor the team, and I don't really have a business, nor any kind of offsetting income. Ditto #4...but I thought the shirts would look cool.

7. I am finally exercising. This is a fact evidenced by my belts becoming too big. I have attacked the process with my usual freakish obessionism, which conclusively has contributed to my nearly broken ankle, pulled leg muscles and tender buttocks. It is also making me much more regular...which in turn...makes your daily dose of Gomer's Pyle easier to obtain. (No Hawaii or Alaskan orders please...I am currently shipping only to the contiguous 48.)

8. Last but not least...I think I am feeling more optimistic about my future. The combination of the good looking resume' along with the regular exercises, has proven to me that I am finally of the mindset to grab the bull by the balls and risk the goring. I may just get a job, quit thinking about fishing 24 hours a day, and re-enter society.

I said I may. Digging deep enough into the Pyle reveals plenty 'nuff self loathing left to keep your feet happy for a while. I think I will go fishing.